Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
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