I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
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if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
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All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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