morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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