This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
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