He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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