Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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