im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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