Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
