Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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