how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize