Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
