That's intense
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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