I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
