Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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