So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
