My Higher Power is John Stamos
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Can I color on your dick again?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I have feelings that need drinking.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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