Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize