I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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