Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
