How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize