still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
