Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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