you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
