I've blown a few things in my day
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
It's just like the Real World with babies
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
