All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
she peed on how many people?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
