you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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