brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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