I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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