i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
