Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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