IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Randomize
