didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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