my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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