Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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