He kissed a someone with a penis
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
