yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
