belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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