you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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