butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
