She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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