woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize