then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
