I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
