Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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