The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Randomize
