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• (313): View more from Michigan

  sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.

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• (818): View more from California

  She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I think I have a pornographic memory.

  (954): View more from Florida

  Don't you mean photographic?

  (407): View more from Florida

  No.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...

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• (239): View more from Florida

  yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  He yearns for your heart.

  (678): View more from Georgia

  He needs to stop being a pussy about it.

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• (760): View more from California

  I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58

  (702): View more from Nevada

  EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?

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• (253): View more from Washington

  So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.

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