chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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