OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
