well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
These tits shall not be calmed
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