I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
