if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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