hotel room ftw
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
