whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
