I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
its not stalking. its research.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize