she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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